Because Everybody Else Has One

Two hours of senseless destruction, groan-worthy dialogue and enough cliches to fill the Hoover Dam? Yes, please! This is a bit late so I'm going to make this quick. San Andreas is total, total nonsense from beginning to end, that assumes that scenes of massive destruction, Alexandra Daddario in a low-cut top and the Rock doing his usual thing would be enough to prevent people from noticing just how rubbish it is. Here's the thing though: it kind of is. No matter what else you might say about it, San Andreas is a film that knows exactly what it is and holds no pretensions to be anything else. It's an old fashioned, thrilling disaster movie with an extremely straightforward story - earthquake beats the crap out of California, family is caught in the middle - and likable lead characters that features just about everything else that you might expect in this sort of thing: kooky scientists that no one listens to being proven horribly right; horrible step dads getting the...